Saturday, June 27, 2009
Finally the days of me sleeping at 4am, paper cuts, panda eyes, waking up at 6 bla bla bla...
ARE...... OVER! :D
I feel so relived but somehow something feels uneasy. I'm not sure what it is, but its something. Anyway, a few days ago; Yi-vonne and Reena slept over(sort of) more of doing our last project assignment. We were busy doing it when SUDDENLY! we were hungry. So at about 4am i drove to the nearest drive-thru McD. Best drive ever. NO cars :D
I went to the speaker box, ordered our food and both yivonne and reena started screaming their lungs out. (we were talking about spirits and ghosts before) So, my foot was not on the break because I was freaked out by their scream because I thought there was some Ju-on beside my window waiting to suck my soul but no it wasn't Ju-on, it was a baby cockroach. HAHA It was at the dashboard and I tried to remove that but it was too fast for me. XD
Thank god I was calm, then I wanted to reverse but the girls asked me to go straight to the counter. I was too ambitious, I wanted to reverse like James Bond, but I failed. So, I drove straight to the counter and I told the lady "Sorry Kak, ada cockroach tadi". (Sorry miss, there was a cockroach) With a very straight face. I wonder what the lady was thinking, I bet she thought we were drunk cause we were very hyper. Whatever it is, I got my burger and fries. Unsatisfied because I did not get my Chicken McDelux. Well, my burger was still chicken. Anyhooooo, We managed to finish it and played the game with the lecturer, the lecturer laughed and sort of enjoyed the game. So i'm GLAD.
I only have Malaysian studies left which is on Wednesday. I need to study to at least pass and not retake that stupid subject for the next semester.
The most shocking moment happened today; I went to college at 9.30 and i stayed there till 4.30. Usually, I'll inform my mom, that I had arrived safely to college because I'm driving and my mom is worried cause I'm a new driver; little does she know, I'm quite pushy while i'm driving. I don't like people bullying me on the road. Anyhow, I totally forgot. My mind was drifting in space. I had an exam at 2.30 so we had to put our bags at the back. During the exam, my mom called me numerous of times and of course I did not pick up. She texted me, but I did not reply. She called my boyfriend, then He called; of course I did not pick up. My mom called my sister to call her boyfriend to find my car at the parking lot just to make sure I'm there. My boyfriend drove all the way to college to find me. It was an honest mistake. It wasn't on purpose. I sincerely forgot. Then I called them back telling them I was at college the whole time and all of them sounded really worried. So yea... my boyfriend came shaking his head coming towards me then asking me to call my mom. I did, I called her first then I called my boyfriend, anyways, he sent me to my car and hugged me saying how worried he was and I kept explaining that I would never do this on purpose and I was at college the WHOLE time. I am sorry for the trouble. I feel guilty for being so irreseponsible. Just when I wrote a whole essay about adulthood and becoming more responsible. How ironic is that? Well I guess I'm still a child.
My schedule is so hectic and my life is all topsy turvy. It sounds easy, but It's hard to handle the amount of pressure we have to go through. Well I'm happy cause I have people who actually care for me. Not only that, so many inconsiderate people too.
Anyhoo, I am signing off.
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Ridiculously I’ve been mad with myself and I think it is just downright stupid. It feels like I’m PMS-ing everyday. It sucks. I’ll get emotional; I realize every detail and point out the mistakes. I hate doing that, but again; I do, do it. I always end up being guilty for the smallest slightest thing. However, ego is another issue. I’m a chick with an ego. Well, everyone has one, you can’t deny, but mine is pretty huge. I do feel like winning, I feel like accusing everyone, I feel like making every small issue into something big PLUS making sure it is not my fault. Damn.. I sound like a bitch. On the other hand, I sustain myself from doing all that, People shouldn’t do that, I shouldn’t do that. I do show it a bit, I know I do; but I guess it’s unnoticeable? I am really sensitive and I cannot control myself. I make everyone’s life difficult. Probably, people can’t bare my melodramatic complaints. Well, in my previous post, I said that I don’t condemn people as much as I did last time, and that’s the truth. However, I complain excessively. From now on, I’ll start being my ‘high-school’ self and prioritize everyone first and putting myself last. It worked last time and made my life easier. I’m not being sarcastic or whatever but I am ACTUALLY being honest here.
This whole post is about reinventing me into a better person. I am still myself, but I just want to be a better person. I won’t change completely. I just feel that, I’m not treating people the way THEY should be treated. Anyways.. I actually thought of colouring my hair red and relaxing it so it’ll lose the ‘frizz’. This is a substitution of piercing my nose. Which I frankly felt like doing, but my mother is against the whole ‘piercing’ frenzy. So I can’t rebel against my mom with this. I respect her decision. Not just that, after my semester finishes, I am going to lose weight. I just need to lose this bulge in my middle section of my body.
Anyhooo, off I go. I need to stop blabbering.
I will write a more ‘meaningful’ post next time.
Friday, June 12, 2009
So, I was thinking and i realized that; I criticize people less than I did last time. I'm not saying that I don't condemn anyone. Of course I do, but If I see, for instance; People smoking or couples making out in public or underage groups going to clubs or drinking alcohol ; I don't give a damn. I'm not saying you should encourage them, but I don't say "EEeee, what the f#$@ ? Why do they do that, it's so wrong. " I used to though. I still complain, that's for sure but I don't do/say that. When I see that, I'll probably make a face (maybe, sometimes) then just walk away or even better just look and walk away. I guess I'm immune to that. I mean come on, almost EVERYONE loves doing what I just stated there and I see that almost everyday. So what, they love doing that, its their problem not mine and maybe without me realizing I may actually do something that I condemned; because of that, I would turn into a bloody hypocrite. So, Its better to shut up and let it be. I guess I criticize less is because the people I mix with don't condemn people that much unlike last time. I've been influenced for the better. :)
This whole few months, I haven't been exercising. I am beyond fat. Seriously, I'm afraid of looking at the scale machine. I know I gained weight, so I don't have any suspense checking it. I just "know". I want to lose my fats so I can wear clothes that looks nice. I have tonnes and tonnes of things to try on, but my weight can't compliment the clothes I want to wear :(
I know I won't grow vertically, so slash all the maxi dresses and shit.
Well, Soon soon, after all my work is done. I shall jog and jog and jog and jog. :)
Talking about work, I keep procrastinating; it's such a sin.
Damn my procrastination, when will it stop. I SHOULD and MUST do my work and finish most of it this two days and next week until submission date.
Well I should get ready, I have a wedding to attend. Another.Wedding. -.-
Signing off now..
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
It is already June and I haven't been updating at all.
I was supposedly to write about my birthday which was a week plus ago and I can tell you it was THE BEST.
Celebrated with dauz, uswah and kamil. We went to the Dim Mak junkyard sale; it was the SHIZNIKS! Dauz slept over the night before after the whole night out then we got ready and went to KL. We actually got lost and asked the security guard from one of the condominiums.
We FINALLY arrived, it was so packed; we could hardly moved.
Met shitdisco, matt cobrasnake, steve aoki, lapsap; took some pictures and signatures.
and GUESS WHAT, I actually told darren from shitdisco that it was my birthday and at that time I was buying their album. THEN, Darren said "OUH! it's your birthday!" (handed out another album and gave it to me for free) He was the nicest, then he signed it and told me that Tom was outside having a drink. Then I went out to ask for HIS signature and i just handed out the CD's and he said "OUH! Its your birthday love?!" (grabbed me by the shoulder and hugged and kissed my cheeks) then continued by signing both my Cd's and talked a bit with me.
That made my day. ahhaha
I bought quite a number of items: bag, shades, earrings, CD. I think that was it.
We went to BB walked around for hours actually. By the time we came back to the car, the car keys were gone and there was a note from the management on the car.
Then they told us that they had the keys and told us to not do that again, bla bla bla...
Went to dauz's house, chilled for a moment and I went back home.
I was so ecstatic.
Anyways, I have been really busy, assignments, projects, exhibition, family, personal problems.
I haven't been planning time properly. I can feel the pressure slowly coming.
Few days ago, I attended for a wedding last weekend and we slept at the Bukit Merah Resort. I can honestly say, the place sucks. I had above average expectations, but the resort was so run-down. They had no quality and the service was just so-so, Safiya (my niece) tagged along and wanted to swim. So my sister, cousin and I went for a swim in the morning. It was so crowded, you would literally hit people in the pool and the children's pool was so packed.
The water was dirty and I felt quite disgusted. Well... I was wearing a bikini top and surfer shorts while most people there were wearing BIG, FLOWY tee-shirts with track pants. They were staring at me like an eagle. C'est tres bizzare. Well it wasn't just the stare, they were being so disrespectful. They were being so 'jakun' . Well, its not like I'm seeing them anytime soon. I just hate those kind of mentality.
Not just that, The room was so small and the bed sheets and sofa's had stains of I-don't-know-what, and the television was broken.
I would not have ever thought, Bukit Merah Resort was like that.
I would think more than 10 times to go there again. I'm serious.
Well, I have nothing to say for now. My brain is 'blank'.
I can't think of anything.
So, I am signing off...